Human relations in Korean Culture emphasize relationship in the community. Moreover, relationship in the meaning and value of life among women makes up a large portion in their lives. If there is a problem in relationship, women suffer from many conflicts and experience hardship. Among various human...
Human relations in Korean Culture emphasize relationship in the community. Moreover, relationship in the meaning and value of life among women makes up a large portion in their lives. If there is a problem in relationship, women suffer from many conflicts and experience hardship. Among various human relations, the relationship between mothers-and daughter-in-law gives women agony and conflict throughout many generations. The relationship between mothers- and daughters-in-law individually and socially contains negative preconception and prejudice so women in their early marriage life predict more conflict and tension compared to other human relations. In the cases of the conflict between mothers- and daughters -in-law, there may be different points of view on their causes. One of the reasons is that mother-in-law did not separate individually from the life before their daughters-in-law come into their lives or the life with their sons, and when daughters-in-law could not separate individually from their ex-marriage life, they enlarge the object relations with their mothers-in-law and do not maintain flexible relations. The thesis clearly shows that the psychological dynamics of daughters-in-law in the relation between mothers-and daughters-in-law reflect their relations to their parents during their childhood. When they experience conflict with their mothers-in-law, daughters-in-law exhibit various patterns: autonomy, self-involvement, resistance, engulfment, avoidance, and passive-aggression types. And based on the personal difference, there are several levels on how much they can endure the conflict situation: acceptance, denial, sustenance, disregard, and conversion type. Negative emotions that daughters-in-law have when they are in conflict with their mothers-in-law are mostly anger, depression, anxiety, inferiority, guilt and frustration. In coping with the conflict with their mothers-in-law, daughters-in-law in general have different tactics: expression, silence, obedience, adherence, and hopelessness type. There is a turning point to the psychological disorder caused by conflict between mother-and daughter-in-law: a. Self-awareness about daughters-in-law themselves. b. Recognizing overwhelming burden in women's married life. c. Transference of the focus of attention from conflict to their children due to unexpected accidents in child rearing. d. Daughters-in-law's confidence in their recognition of their mothers-in-law's weakened power when they erupted their feelings which had not been expressed for the long time. Additionally as indicated in a desirable marriage relations, daughters-in-law's freedom from relationship between mother-and daughter-in-law by the personality integration with their spouses. In a series of these processes Christianity have provided daughters-in-law with a secure base where they profess their agony to the Lord, gain comfort, energy and have given them ability to turn to a new life. And Christianity also have made it possible that daughters-in-law separate and individualize themselves, and live their own lives, and furthermore enlarge their capacity to accept the conflict and understand their mothers-in-law. The reason why daughters-in-law experience above mentioned conflicts is largely attributed to the relations with their parents in their psychological development. In the psychological development processes the daughters-in-law who experienced normal separation individuation have stable relationship between mother-and daughter-in-law but those who experienced separation anxiety involve themselves, fall into a inferiority, or blame themselves for the conflict and turned into a inability status. Those who have delayed separation become dependant and those who have early separation do not have friendly relations with their mothers-in-law due to deprivation of love. When daughters-in-law experienced hatching damage, they became aggressive and have a delusion of persecution. When experiencing avoidant attachment, they suppress their emotion and do not react to conflicts. When experiencing resistant attachment, because of their parents' inconsistent reponses , they first become vulnerable. The study shows that when daughters-in-law do not experience normal separation individuation, they can not maintain stable reactions on inter-personal relations as well as relations between mother-and daughter-in-law and this makes the relationship with their mothers-in-law uncomfortable and drive them into conflicting situation. Based on the process of psychological development by Mahler, churches should provide programs through which mothers-and daughters-in-law could reexperience separation and individuation. And churches should be trusted as a secure base for Christians. Church supervisors should help Christians to grow intrapsychic side and their faith.
Human relations in Korean Culture emphasize relationship in the community. Moreover, relationship in the meaning and value of life among women makes up a large portion in their lives. If there is a problem in relationship, women suffer from many conflicts and experience hardship. Among various human relations, the relationship between mothers-and daughter-in-law gives women agony and conflict throughout many generations. The relationship between mothers- and daughters-in-law individually and socially contains negative preconception and prejudice so women in their early marriage life predict more conflict and tension compared to other human relations. In the cases of the conflict between mothers- and daughters -in-law, there may be different points of view on their causes. One of the reasons is that mother-in-law did not separate individually from the life before their daughters-in-law come into their lives or the life with their sons, and when daughters-in-law could not separate individually from their ex-marriage life, they enlarge the object relations with their mothers-in-law and do not maintain flexible relations. The thesis clearly shows that the psychological dynamics of daughters-in-law in the relation between mothers-and daughters-in-law reflect their relations to their parents during their childhood. When they experience conflict with their mothers-in-law, daughters-in-law exhibit various patterns: autonomy, self-involvement, resistance, engulfment, avoidance, and passive-aggression types. And based on the personal difference, there are several levels on how much they can endure the conflict situation: acceptance, denial, sustenance, disregard, and conversion type. Negative emotions that daughters-in-law have when they are in conflict with their mothers-in-law are mostly anger, depression, anxiety, inferiority, guilt and frustration. In coping with the conflict with their mothers-in-law, daughters-in-law in general have different tactics: expression, silence, obedience, adherence, and hopelessness type. There is a turning point to the psychological disorder caused by conflict between mother-and daughter-in-law: a. Self-awareness about daughters-in-law themselves. b. Recognizing overwhelming burden in women's married life. c. Transference of the focus of attention from conflict to their children due to unexpected accidents in child rearing. d. Daughters-in-law's confidence in their recognition of their mothers-in-law's weakened power when they erupted their feelings which had not been expressed for the long time. Additionally as indicated in a desirable marriage relations, daughters-in-law's freedom from relationship between mother-and daughter-in-law by the personality integration with their spouses. In a series of these processes Christianity have provided daughters-in-law with a secure base where they profess their agony to the Lord, gain comfort, energy and have given them ability to turn to a new life. And Christianity also have made it possible that daughters-in-law separate and individualize themselves, and live their own lives, and furthermore enlarge their capacity to accept the conflict and understand their mothers-in-law. The reason why daughters-in-law experience above mentioned conflicts is largely attributed to the relations with their parents in their psychological development. In the psychological development processes the daughters-in-law who experienced normal separation individuation have stable relationship between mother-and daughter-in-law but those who experienced separation anxiety involve themselves, fall into a inferiority, or blame themselves for the conflict and turned into a inability status. Those who have delayed separation become dependant and those who have early separation do not have friendly relations with their mothers-in-law due to deprivation of love. When daughters-in-law experienced hatching damage, they became aggressive and have a delusion of persecution. When experiencing avoidant attachment, they suppress their emotion and do not react to conflicts. When experiencing resistant attachment, because of their parents' inconsistent reponses , they first become vulnerable. The study shows that when daughters-in-law do not experience normal separation individuation, they can not maintain stable reactions on inter-personal relations as well as relations between mother-and daughter-in-law and this makes the relationship with their mothers-in-law uncomfortable and drive them into conflicting situation. Based on the process of psychological development by Mahler, churches should provide programs through which mothers-and daughters-in-law could reexperience separation and individuation. And churches should be trusted as a secure base for Christians. Church supervisors should help Christians to grow intrapsychic side and their faith.
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